Crooked Creek Video

Here is the video capturing moments from our high school retreat earlier this year.

I thought many of you would enjoying taking a peak into this side of my life! Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s0dIO5hhH78

Much Needed Update.

To all of my family and friends in California, I am so sorry that I have been delinquent at keeping you all updated on my new adventure. Sometimes I feel like I am on an extended mission trip and will just head home at Christmas time- then I step back and realize how real this is. I packed what I could fit in my car. Drove 4 states away. Moved in with a family I had never met. Started a career, that I never thought I would being, doing 6 days later. When I stand back and look at the reality of how my life has changed in the past 3 1/2 months, I am blown away- and yet, amazed at how God has intricately worked out all of the details.

Everyone has told me that my goal, as a first year teacher, should simply be keeping my head above water. Simple enough, right? I am treading water harder that I ever did in swim team, that's for sure. Every day, I take a long, deep breath. Remind myself why the heck I am teaching. And dive right it. To come home, start planning and finish more grading. When I decided NOT to be a teacher my first year at college, one of my arguments was "I don't like homework. I don't want to give homework to students. Because that just gives me more homework." Ironic. I am going to stop being so opinionated.

The kids are precious. Sometimes I feel like I am babysitting my 6th graders and then one of them comes up to me with an innocent question like, "Why do people raise their hands when they worship? Do I have to do that to worship?" These questions remind me how moldable they truly are. It has challenged me to look at my faith in a whole new direction. Without getting into the details of my high school classes...I will simply say that it is a challenge. It is impossible to instill passion for Christ in each student and then measure their growth. I am over "Sunday school" answers and am ready for these kids to really encounter WHO Jesus is. Understanding and experiencing how passionate Christ is for each of their hearts would set them free in so many ways.

As much as I would love to say that I have developed a fabulous social life, its not true. But enough of work. Over fall break I moved to Loveland and into a house with two wonderful ladies that I work with. They have been such a blessing in my life. We are having way too much fun together. In between the move, I hopped on a plane for my first visit to NYC! It was a four day get away that was absolutely necessary. My goal: drink coffee. sit on a bench in central park. throw some leaves in the air. drink more coffee. You get the picture. It was a great trip. Pretty sure I walked a marathon in one day. Now, I cannot wait to go back with my family for Christmas. Seeing the nutcracker in NYC has been a dream of mine since I was a little girl. One day.

Last Tuesday I woke up and realized, I am not in southern California anymore. We had a nice, beautiful, COLD layer of snow outside of our house. Gorgeous. But I do not feel equipped to drive in this weather at all. To be completely honest. I am terrified. Time to get over that or else I will not have a functional life for the next 6 months. I have had the chance to see Catherine (my roomie from college) and her great husband a couple times in the past two weeks. They are a breath of fresh air. CJ used to play for BYU, so the three of us went to the BYU vs. CSU game last weekend. SO fun. Minus the sudden attack of snow that fell on us. The frozen toes because I clearly do not know what real socks are. And the angry CSU fans because CJ flaunted his BYU colors.

For those of you that prayed for my dad when he landed in the ER, thank you. Not being able to drive my car over to the hospital and be with family was one of the hardest parts of this fall. I am so thankful for all of you that surrounded him and my mom with prayers, support and love! I cannot wait to see you all at Christmas!

I will let the Bible teacher in me come out one more time. My students are memorizing James 1:19-27 and I have become so encouraged through the conversations that are coming out of this. Verse 27 says, "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." God is increasing my capacity to love by revealing pieces of His heart to me. I wonder, what would it look like if the reality of this verse, and God's love was REAL to each of us?

All My Love.

Nicole

New Chairs!

New Chairs in my Classroom :) Next steps. Rug. Coffee Pot...

The tree on the wall is the mural for the year. The kids are posting prayers, struggles, hopes and words from this year! It is exciting to have a visible representation of their growth!

Father's Love.

A while ago I posted a song my Kim Walker ("How He Loves Us").

Last night at church, Pastor Jonathan was trying to express the joy and heart of the Father towards us. He asked his two little girls to come on stage. One of the girls sat at the piano, and very cautiously, started playing. The younger of the two grabbed the microphone from her dad and turned her back to the whole church. Without hesitation she started singing the lyrics to "How He Loves Us". Back turned. Eyes closed. Believing every word that she was signing.

Their father stood over them the whole time with the biggest smile on his face. He would look at his girls with admiration and then look to the church and say..."these are my girls. I am so proud of them. And at is the most beautiful piano playing and signing that I have ever heard". As the camera panned around, it caught a glimpse of the younger girl's face...and as she began to repeat the chorus again, a huge smile came over her face. In the presence of her father, she had no worries that hundreds of people sat behind her. She was worshiping from the depths of who she was. No concern from impressing others, worries of criticism, or embarrassment.

Too often we forget that our Father is SO proud of us. He is signing over YOU. He is proud of YOU. And while we are so concerned with everyone around...He still stands there. So passionately in love with YOU. And says, "I love you. YOU are so beautiful to me."

Father's love. Unconditional.

Risk.

I could literally write a 500 page book retelling the events of the past few weeks. I have been terribly at keeping this updated. For my huge fan following- forgive me :)

Diving right it.

Days after I updated my blog, speaking about how darkness cannot be where light is- I was confronted with a situation that really forced me to understand what this meant.

While at home, with the other girl that lives here, someone broke into the house. Just picture two terrified, shaken up blonde girls being escorted out of a house by 3 police men with guns and dogs...while the interior, exterior and surrounding street is covered in police. There are so many crazy details to this story, but now that weeks have passed I have been challenged to learn to live a life of confidence in God's power and love instead of continual fear.

I took this story into my classroom. It was one of the first times that I allowed myself to be vulnerable with them. This led to GREAT conversations and really started opening up avenues of trust with several of them.

Teaching has to be one of the hardest jobs a live. I am convinced. Trying to balance what it looks like to be a teacher and youth pastor at the same times is ridiculous.

I have decided that I am going to try to dive into the church that the school is connected with. There is an undeniable hunger for Jesus in their community that I am excited to be a part of. They have a young adult group. One step at a time. I will get there.

SO. Monday we made the trek up to Winter Park area for the annual high school retreat. The three young, beautiful, new teachers were assigned to a bus full of freshman and sophomores (mostly boys that smelled like they dumped bottles of ax on their person before walking on the bus). Our bus had the infamous nickname- "The Prison Bus". I am pretty sure we were assigned to this bus, with this group of students as initiation. There is no other explanation.

We stopped at a famous pizza place in Idaho Springs called BoJoes. My world was kind of rocked. They put HONEY on their pizza. Literally. Ever table had bottles of honey to put on your pizza. These crazy Colorado people.

The camp that we went to was a Young Life Retreat Center. It was gorgeous. Nothing like what I ever experienced as a camper or leader. The food. Completely edible. AND enjoyable. Crazy. Young life knows how to do something right!

The theme of each of retreat was "Risk". The kids were challenged to look at what risk in their relationships looks like. Lives were changed for eternity. There was such an overwhelming response to the presence of the Lord the very first night at chapel. I was blown away. In all my years of working in youth group settings and camps- I have never experienced anything similar to this. I was in a cabin with 16 of my junior girls. Those moments were so precious and delicate. When people look at teenagers and underestimate their depth of pain and the degree of life that they have experienced, they are severely wrong. These girls hold deep scars and wounds- but are ready to free fall back into the arms of Jesus.

The next day was full of sports activity. Me getting knocked out with a volleyball. Taken out in softball by the art teacher. Bruised up from dodgeball. Talent show. The giant free fall swing off a mountain (where literally 40 of my students watched me FREAK out and scream at the top of my lungs). There are so many fun details to this experience....but I walked away from 3 days immersed with students, having completely fallen in love with all of them.

As I walked the halls of the school this morning and watched the students flood into my classroom- it took everything me to hold back tears. They have stolen my heart. End of story. No longer do I see the surfaces annoyances...but students crying out for someone to love them. to hear them. to walk with them.

On top of all of this, God has blessed me with an amazing sister to walk through this process with. Kendra is a new English teacher at the school. Just moved to Loveland with her new husband...and is a complete God sent. She and I have daily venting sessions. Chocolate consumption sessions. And cry sessions. Being at retreat with her, I was overwhelmed by how united our hearts and visions are for our students. Its a beautiful friendship I am excited to keep growing in :)

My lovely friends and family. I do miss you like crazy. Your prayers are appreciated. Cherished. and so special to me.

All My Love.

Thinking.

I think having no time to think is good. Right now. Don't get me wrong, I think about a lot of things- Like how to explain to 65 6th graders how Adam woke up one day and saw a beautiful woman that was unlike any of the other creation he had seen...with out them giggling for the next thirty minutes. Or how am I going to have prom planned in a room of loud juniors, once a week, for 50 minutes and actually be productive...what is it going to take to get through to the students that make going to the principals office a daily goal... how do I minister pastorally to the students that are open and hurting while still maintaining the boundaries of being an authority. These thoughts. Great. Absolutely necessary.

But the moment I slip out of these thoughts, step back and look at where I live, what I am attempting to do and the fact that I am all alone. That is terrifying.

People keep telling me that I am brave. But I have always figured that this was the natural process of growing up and growing into who God has created you to be.

Week three is officially done. The reality and intensity of my situation is settling in. Everything in me wants to retreat to my safe place or safe people in moments like this- but knowing that is not even a possibility will keep my feet moving one foot in front of the other.

I have faced more struggles in the classroom this week than I anticipated. I am comforted by the knowledge that where God is at work, Satan presses in even more.

What's on the horizon?

Labor day. YES! You have no idea how nice a 3 day weekend will be :)

Camp CCR- High school retreat for 3 days. Did I mention I am not a mountain girl. Yeah. We will see how that goes.

Middle school chapel. I am speaking! Wahoo!

The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me;
your love, O LORD, endures forever—
do not abandon the works of your hand

All My Love.

Ms. H :)

One.

Before I could even start writing this, I had to take the deepest, longest breath I have ever taken.

Week one. Done. Hallelujah!!!

If I can get through this week, I know I can get through the rest.

So, a little over view.

Monday was 6th grade and new student orientation. It was so precious seeing all of the 6th graders SO excited to be in middle school. The most anticipated event. Getting their lockers :)

Learning how to open them is pretty similar to getting into a bank safe, but they are determined! The classes of the week seem to all blend together. I have accepted the fact that I am going to be on most high schoolers' bad side...for a long time. Our superintendent's heart is communicating a message of "love" and "unity" within the school this year. To piggy back on that, I took time to go through 1 Cor. 13:1-8 in my high school classes (and I am making them memorize it by friday!). We wrapped up the week with the ancient form of prayer, meditation and revelation in practicing "Lectio Divina". This week was a good intro, but I am definitely excited to jump into the curriculum on Monday! My 6th graders are going to be spending the week intently looking at Genesis (with a fun twist of course)!

So. That is school. But I am quickly learning that school is going to encompass so many aspects of my life. I am making wonderful friends. Girls that keep me laughing when I want to cry, keep me on my toes, and tear me away from my classroom to go out! One of them put a beach ball on my desk with a note saying, "for the days when you miss the beach". Not that I actually went to the beach every day, but that moment that I can't have it, I want to go so badly. Lame.

Your prayers for strength, clarity and health would be much appreciated!

Love Never Fails.